That is how long it's been since I saw my dad, at least until last weekend. My parents divorced when I was 8 and I went to visit every so often. My dad remarried and a few years later they moved to another state about 11 hours away. As a young teenager I went to visit in summers, I turned 16 the last summer I went to visit and we only spoke over the phone the next two years. I turned 18 and we never talked again until I sent him my college graduation invitation. To my surprise and delight they came up. It was great. About 8 months later Jamie and I got engaged. I was torn about how to handle the wedding. My step-dad had raised me as his daughter from teen years on and I didn't want things to be weird. I could have handled things better in retrospect, but hind sight is 20/20 right? Anyway, feelings got hurt and my dad didn't come, so Jamie met my dad for the first time last weekend. As did my girls.
What prompted the meeting? Well, you see neither of us were holding any grudges, there was no hate, no bitterness, it was just less messy to not deal with it. In some opinions I had wronged him and it was my responsibility to initiate reconciliation and apologize. In other opinions he was the one in the wrong for the last x number of years and he was the parent and it was his job to initiate. So that's where things have been the last 7 years. Last year Andy Stanley spoke about relationships in
a series called "Fight Club". I knew it wouldn't fly with God if I used the whole "I'm in the right here" argument and I knew I needed to make the move.
So I called and they were moving to Nashville, then we moved, then holidays and snow. So last weekend, it was time and we went and had a great time. It was so good to see my dad and his wife and for him to meet Jamie and the girls. The even took us all to the Nashville Zoo, or "Zoo-Z-Zoo" as the girls call it. It's one step of faith in obedience at a time. I can't help but think about how scripture encourages us
not to delay, but obey quickly. It was something I should have worked quickly to resolve. Time made it that much more difficult, not to mention the blessings missed. It seems like it is somehow linked to a monumental change in my spirit and the plans God has for me.
What prompted the meeting? Well, you see neither of us were holding any grudges, there was no hate, no bitterness, it was just less messy to not deal with it. In some opinions I had wronged him and it was my responsibility to initiate reconciliation and apologize. In other opinions he was the one in the wrong for the last x number of years and he was the parent and it was his job to initiate. So that's where things have been the last 7 years. Last year Andy Stanley spoke about relationships in a series called "Fight Club". I knew it wouldn't fly with God if I used the whole "I'm in the right here" argument and I knew I needed to make the move. 
So I called and they were moving to Nashville, then we moved, then holidays and snow. So last weekend, it was time and we went and had a great time. It was so good to see my dad and his wife and for him to meet Jamie and the girls. The even took us all to the Nashville Zoo, or "Zoo-Z-Zoo" as the girls call it. It's one step of faith in obedience at a time. I can't help but think about how scripture encourages us not to delay, but obey quickly. It was something I should have worked quickly to resolve. Time made it that much more difficult, not to mention the blessings missed. It seems like it is somehow linked to a monumental change in my spirit and the plans God has for me.
1 comment:
Jen,
You can choose not to approve this comment if it's too personal, but I wanted you to know that I think it's wonderful that you took this step to love your dad. I can't imagine how it must have felt but you have to know that God was smiling with you.
Thanks for sharing. It encourages me to step out and love all the hard people in my life.
love,
missy
ps. The quilt is so adorable and matches our living room perfectly so it's the new blankie to use in the rocking chair in the living room. Thanks again.
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